Reality TV

Sitting there reading a fashion magazine
to get the latest lowdown on the entertainment scene
suddenly I had it--it was perfect for me
I could be the king of Reality TV
I know that my existence is boring and slow
but everybody tells me “you aught to write what you know”
besides, i thought, what could be more real than this?
absolute reality--how could I miss?

I want a show about me and my little life
all about my hobbies the kids and the wife
a show about me and what I’m about
if you’re into that you really need to get out

it's a fascinating look at the way that I live
it's your voyeuristic programming alternative
all you gotta do is put your feet and recline
and feel the thrill of stepping from your life into mine
it’s a little bit tame, I’m the first to admit
but if you want reality, then surely this is it
although my language can get peppered by “goshes” and “hecks”
it’s all rated G because there is no violence or sex

You can watch me get up and check on the mail
on a very special episode tomorrow I will unveil
that I’m going to get some breakfast, and grab a cup of tea
all while you sit there watching me
is this what you like? Is this all there is?
have you given up your whole life for show biz?
you can sit and watch me for hours at a time
but are you really watching your life or mine?

© 2008 David Stoddard